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Many adults come to counselling feeling frustrated with themselves. They might say things like, “I know where this comes from, but I still keep reacting the same way,” or “Why do I feel like this in relationships, even when nothing ‘bad’ is happening?” Often, what’s underneath isn’t a lack of insight or effort, it’s an attachment pattern that developed early in life. What are attachment patterns? Attachment patterns are ways we learned to relate to others, ourselves, and emo